By Emilie Gruben
Sephora. Influencers. Solo care days. Selfishness. What do they all have in common? More than you would think.
The Bible constantly shows the need for wisdom and knowledge, repeating that our souls are higher in importance than our physical bodies. There are many passages like 1 Peter 3:3-4:
“Do not let your adornment be merely outward-arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel-rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”
The passage goes on to say how women used to adorn themselves with humility and submissiveness to their husbands, calling on the Lord, and being faithful daughters. This, at its core, is what we are raised for and strive to be. Faithful. Not wanting jewels and beauty, but a purity only granted by our faith. But in our world today, that is not what women want. Even in Peter’s time, he saw the change in women in the church and outside of it, and gave his instruction to those with faith to change their ways. So we must do our best to follow the instructional examples that he gave.
In a world of influencers and screens, we follow the words and examples of mere strangers. We are influenced to think about, want, and take what we are told to desire. Influencers, whether you hate them or love them, are really, really good at their jobs. Influencers make us desire something that we never would have thought about before, pay for it, and devote our time to that new purchase. In return, companies and influencers get paid for our impulsiveness and greed. They get paid in attention, products for themselves, and money. These ways of reward go back to the Bible’s example of jewels and gold. From want to the influencer to the product to the profit, it is an endless circle of greed and selfishness. That ends up changing us. We only think about what we gain: a prettier face, time off for ourselves… the list goes on and on. But what does the Bible say? Matt. 16:26 says,
“For what profit is it to man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?”
This really brings us to the problem. What will we give up before we have given our soul and mind away?
I know of many women and girls who devote their leisurely spending money and time to what you could consider a hobby of shopping and using products. They are very sweet, and would offer to help you with your hair or makeup in a heartbeat. They love going out with each other, buying the newest cream, getting a coffee, and then doing it again the next week. While this doesn’t appear wrong or harmful, at first, it can be. The idea of having “a self care day” away from responsibility and anyone in your life whom you have deemed “toxic” or “tiring” is attractive, but self-care can quickly turn into a selfish excuse for not doing what is necessary because you don’t want to. We can’t simply take days off from life and people who test our patience. 1 Tim. 5:6 illustrates this idea. “But she who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives.”
In time, we see the effects of physical care and habits. Devoting your time to growing skills in makeup and hair can be impressive and quite rewarding. You could be the friend who everyone turns to for help with their own beauty needs, special opportunities at events, or even careers in cosmetical workspaces. But despite the benefits, it can be very negatively impacting. The more time you spend on your appearance, the more time you spend thinking about it. You set aside time to make sure that you reach your goal of how you want your hair to look, or your eyeshadow to shine. You think about it more and more. When the results aren’t what you want, you can get frustrated and angry. When your skin and hair don’t look the way you want, it can push you to feel ashamed, embarrassed and depressed. You think even more about how you look, but with a cloudy haze that makes you feel hopeless and like your goal is never achievable.
This never ending desire for a perfect look or specific feeling won’t ever stop. Adam and Eve had everything in the garden and still longed for more. Nothing will ever be enough for our human nature. These unhealthy forms of self care turn into obsessions of ungodly and unbeneficial habits. It changes how we see ourselves and others, forever. You find yourself judging on looks and silently applying beauty standards and techniques upon life, without reason.
This directly contradicts Christ. We are instructed to praise God for who we have been created in His image. Psalms 139:13-14, “For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.”
I don’t think that “self-care” is good; the phrase has become tinted by our fallen society. Instead, taking care of yourself in godliness is definitely something we must do. Our bodies are temples, God tells us in 1 Cor. 6:19. God does not want us to neglect the wonderful bodies that He gave us, nor does he want us to enter into ourselves in selfishness and idolatry. The sacred blessing of having a god-given body is one to hold with dignity and gratitude. We must put effort into our appearance and behavior, taking care of our skin and weight in a way that honors the Lord. We must show our gratitude for His wonderful creation, not enter into ourselves.
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