By Emilie Gruben.
The world today is one of selfishness. It always has been, from the very first week of time. Eve could not hold back from her sinful selfishness to pursue what had been forbidden of her. God gave clear rules in the Garden, as to what could and could not be eaten (Genesis 2:16-17). Eve did not obey, nor heed the warnings of death and punishment that God so clearly stated. She indulged herself in the perilous thralls of sin, and plunged the entire human race into a life of misery, beginning with her husband, Adam. We see boundaries that have been set for us, through the Word, since the beginning of time. But we always find ways to break them. Today’s article will be finding ways to set boundaries in a selfish world, separate from sin.
If you have spent any amount of time on social media, live tv, secular podcasts, or even in your local grocery store, you have no doubt seen or heard the talk of “boundaries.” A conversation about stressful relationships could go as follows:
“When people upset you and constantly pose a threat to your peace, you need to take action. There’s no need to subject yourself to the toxicity of others. Your life is your life-no one else’s. Have some self-love and protect your peace! Set those boundaries, cut off those ‘relationships,’ and live the best life you can. Your life is too short to be wasted dealing with other people’s harmful, unwanted behaviors and emotions. Prioritize yourself through your boundaries.”
If I were to say any portion of that was right, would you believe me? Before you start to remove yourself from any affiliation with this blog, let’s consider, for a moment. What is one thing the world does have as the right idea? No, it’s not putting self first, no matter what. No, it’s not never seeing yourself as wrong or in need of change. It’s not living for happiness and peace, no matter the cost. Do you know what it is? It’s setting boundaries. We must set Biblical boundaries.
As a Christian, you are set apart. This should not come as a surprise. 2 Cor. 5:17 reads: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” The new person in Christ will seek what is honoring to Him. Your life will not be focused on self, but on others and God’s plan. Your life is not your own, but God’s. You are not taking breaks of distance from others for yourself, but for the Holy Spirit in you. No longer have you been focused on who is negatively impacting your emotions or “peace,” disrupting your hobbies or interests but who is pushing you away from Christ and disrupting your walk in faith. This difference is one that must be recognizable and be at the heart of your salvation. You are not the same as you were-and praise the Lord for that! We are a new body, living and breathing for Him.
We set ourselves apart from the ungodly or secular, not because of how they make us feel, but because God has commanded us to. No matter how kind or how “toxic” a person may be, we are to be set apart as God’s chosen people. You will not fit in, nor should you want to. You are the Lord’s, and not of this world. Only when you truly stick to what is right, will you see this change occur. The more faithful you are to God’s commands, the more you will see the impact sin has on the world and relationships. What the world has to offer will grow dim and meaningless, and you will begin to hate what you see. Likewise, the world will hate your faith, abstinence of sin, and your drive to reject a way of folly. This, again, is no new discovery to the Christian heart. John 15:19 so powerfully reads “If you were of the world the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.”
Even when we distance, we do this action out of love. Love for the Father, and love for His Word. Our new lives are a constant, grateful reminder of devotion to Christ for His mercy and forgiveness. As Christians, living in the loving mercy of Christ, we are instructed to love others. Again, in John 15 we read of this command to love and serve as Christ has. Verses 7-17 read:
“If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples. As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose Me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain, that whatever you ask the Father in My name He may give you. These things I command you, that you love one another.”
We love one another, whether those we show love towards our brethren in Christ or the ungodly. This love does not skip over discernment or justice, neither does it shun or break down. The world tries to twist and destroy this godly love as it does with all else good and righteous. Love is not solely reserved for romance and emotions of relationships, nor is it a representative of the sinful facade that is found in homosexuality, immorality, or other forms of ungodly expression. Our love is to mirror that of Christ on the cross, His only prayer being a plea of forgiveness for those who assailed Him. A love for the beggars, the lepers, the tax collectors, prostitutes, demon possessed, and the outcasts. However, our job is to not love everyone with this love, as if we have no weakness. The Son of God, Himself, fell into temptation and we will certainly be no different. Our boundaries must be made in love, but against the worldly facade of love. We cannot fall into accepting sin, or growing numb to its pull or seriousness, lest we fall away from truth and reality.
This facade of love can not only make an appearance in friendships, but also in family relationships. Unsaved family members, relations who indulge in worldly marriages or partnerships, or even abusive situations. Boundaries are to be made against such things that normalize or even courage such sin, but even in this love for others and not for their wrongdoings, we must focus on our respect and responsibility as Christians. Again, we cannot disassociate ourselves from people just because they make us feel bad, or disrupt our lifestyles. But there is a relationship between family and Christ that cannot be broken or distanced. This is also addressed in our article Forgiveness and Holding Grudges as a Christian.
As the saying goes, when the rubber meets the road, this last point is the reason for this article-we can’t take God’s Word lightly and forget what it truly means. The world will say many things and nearly every last one of them will be wrong. The world hated Jesus, and it will hate those who follow Him, for the rest of mankind’s existence. We have to set boundaries, Christian. Whether men or women, young or old, home or not-we must have boundaries set and rooted in the Word of God.
Boundaries must be set in the things we listen to. Music, podcasts, radios, and personal conversations. We must set limits for ourselves in the things we watch. Movies, shows, tutorials, classes, and plays. The things we wear. The relationships we build and pursue, those who we surround ourselves with. The words we say and think, the vocabulary we know, and the things we say to others. The politics which we allow ourselves to be associated with. Every last thing that can be traced to the world must be dealt with, carefully. Set the boundaries for your temptations and leanings, with discernment and faith. You are not invincible, and never will be. The hedges you put up in your life are not for selfish gain or comfort, but for the strength of the relationship between you and the Savior of the world. Paul writes to Timothy, a letter of encouragement. We are equipped for every trial, by His word. 2 Timothy 3:10-17 reads:
“But you have carefully followed my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, love, perseverance, persecutions, afflictions, which happened to me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra—what persecutions I endured. And out of them all the Lord delivered me. Yes, and all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. But evil men and impostors will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived. But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
Look not to the world for your answers, nor in your selfish heart for your limits. Set your limits and discern your thoughts and actions, not for gain but for Christ alone. That your every breath, action, and thought be praise to the name of the Lord.
Post a Comment